On March 8, 2023 and (fittingly) International Women’s Day, I
attended my first birth in Quesnel. Buckle up folks, cause this one was quite a
ride!
Crystal
and Kyle contacted me in January and after a lovely meet and greet they invited
me to be apart of their birth team. This was baby #3 for Crystal and
Kyles first. I liked them both immediately. Crystal’s approach to her upcoming
birth was super chill and relaxed, very much a “whatever will be will be” kind
of approach. Kyles approach was to be as present and supportive to Crystal as
possible. Great mindset and I was pumped to be back to my doula life!
Crystal
and I stayed in pretty close contact over the next few weeks, her previous
babies both came a couple weeks early, and I wanted to be ready for anything.
At 36 weeks we thought maybe it was go time but baby was just kidding! It was a
great opportunity for a dry run!
37,
38 and 39 weeks came and went, and I’m pretty sure Crystal was convinced she was
going to be pregnant forever. 40 weeks is a long time, it’s an even longer time
when you’ve never had to go more than 38 weeks.
I
generally check in with my clients daily as we approach their due dates, it helps
me get a sense of how they are doing and a sense of how close we are to the
main event. I chatted with Crystal the morning of the 8th (her actual due date)
and she said there was nothing to report, just that she was uncomfortable but her
baby girl seemed way too comfortable. She had an appointment with her doctor
scheduled for the next day and we agreed to touch base after that. Turns out
Crystal wasn’t being completely forthcoming with all the details of her day and
was in fact experiencing some mild contractions. She just didn’t want to say
anything yet in case it was nothing.
At
around 8pm that evening she texted me to say that was pretty sure her water had
broken, “for real this time”. She said she was having mild
contractions, not really painful and we agreed to start getting ready to make
our way to the hospital. I made my way to their home first to check on her and
found her on all fours on the living room floor. Her contractions were not mild
and things were very much picking up. Kyle got the truck packed up, and as soon
as Kyle’s lovely parents arrived to watch their other children, we headed off
to the hospital.
We
arrived at the hospital just before 9pm, Crystal had zero fun on the short
drive and her contractions were coming hard and fast. Once we got up the labour
and delivery room, the nurses got her admitted and assessed. Her first exam
revealed that she was 3cm dilated and Crystal was not happy. She was
contracting one after the other and really wanted something to help take the
edge off. She asked for the laughing gas and once they handed her the mask, she
grabbed on for dear life! I’ve had many mamas love the gas but none have gone
through it quite like Crystal. Hey, you do what works for you and this is what
was working for her.
Crystals labour came on like a freight train and she felt like she wasn’t handling it and that she couldn’t do it. Not at all uncommon to feel like that, especially when you are getting close to the end. As an observer, I can assure that not only was she handling it, she was absolutely ROCKING IT. Kyle was incredible, right there for her and with her every step of the way. Her nursing team was amazing as well.
By
10pm Crystal was ready for something a little stronger than gas and was asking
for an epidural. For that to happen in Quesnel the doctor has to come in and
examine her and the anesthesiologist has to come in as well. It doesn’t happen
quickly. At 1045 she was examined to see if she was far enough along. She was
5cm, it was agreed she could have the epidural and the calls were made. The
nurses started to get things ready.
In
the meantime, I got Crystal into the shower to try and help with her pain while
we waited, hoping the water would work its magic. After a few minutes we got
her out of the shower to get her ready for her epidural. Once she was back in
bed, baby girl started to let us know she was not enjoying this intense labour
and her heart rate started to drop. The nurses were amazing and took charge,
doing everything to make sure baby was ok. When this happens things can get a
little crazy and mom has to be flipped around from side to side to see if there
a position that baby likes more. Crystal just went with whatever we told her to
do. She found her rhythm with her contractions and took each one as it
came.
At
11:15pm, Crystal was examined again and we were told she was only at 6cm. Baby still wasn’t tolerating labour and calls were made to get the emergency room doctor up to
the floor as well as any other available staff to assist. Immediately the room
was filled with doctors and nurses to help get ready to move her to the OR for
a C-section. It was a lot of commotion and can be really scary but amazingly,
Crystal and Kyle were calm and focused. She was doing everything for her baby
and Kyle was doing everything for her. He was her focal point through each
contraction. Their connection was palpable.
A
stretcher was brought in to move her to the OR and just before we moved her
onto it the ER doctor checked her one more time and said “wait, baby’s head is
right here, she’s almost out!”. Crystal was (not so gently)
instructed to push as hard as she could and I can tell you first hand that this
woman doesn’t f@#* around! She moved her baby down just as the Obstetrician
arrived to assist. And within a couple of pushes at 11:38pm, baby girl was
born! She was pink and squealing and placed immediately on her beautiful mama’s
chest. I cannot even begin to tell you what a beautiful sound it was to hear
that little one cry.
After
a quick cuddle with her mom, she was taken to be checked out and the new dad
went with her. I stayed with Crystal while we waited for the placenta to come.
And we waited and then we waited some more. Unfortunately, sometimes the placenta just doesn't want to cooperate and Crystal was starting to bleed. The decision was
made to take her to the OR to get it out. Again, this incredible woman just
rolled with it. No panic, no fighting it, she did what needed to be done. I’m
not sure I can put into words how hard it is to have to leave your baby, only
moments old and be taken to surgery alone. They quickly whisked her away and I
stayed behind with Kyle and babe.
To
say Kyle was smitten with his new baby girl would be the understatement of the
decade. This man was “head over heels, I’m going to buy you a pony” in love.
She stole his heart immediately and he is never going to get it back. It was so
incredibly touching to watch.
We
waited for an update on Crystal and shortly before 2am the surgeon came to leg
Kyle know that Crystal was ok, and would be moved up to a room in the ICU soon.
Once she was in her room, Kyle and their perfect baby girl were taken to her
and finally after a long night the 3 were together and baby girl was safe in
her mamas’ arms.
This
is not my usual sunshiny birth story but it does have a very happy ending with
a healthy, perfect baby girl and an incredible mom who is on the mend.
I
know I always say I am in awe of the strength of my mamas but this time I was
absolutely blown away by the women of this birth. The nurses, especially
Shannon and Sierra who managed to be kind and nurturing while simultaneously
being badass boss babes in the midst of chaos. The baby girl who came roaring
into the world fierce and strong. And last but far from least, the brave,
beautiful and powerful mama who did what needed to be done for her baby.
My
first Cariboo birth was one for the books and I am deeply humbled to have been
apart of the story.
Welcome
to the world sweet Abigail.
Abigail
Ann Clark
March
8, 2023 11:38pm
7lbs
11oz